Last week we were invited along with some friends for dinner at the home of a mutual acquaintance. The friend who invited us cooks for Drew and me fairly regularly, and is well acquainted with gluten-free cooking. He talked to the person who was hosting the dinner about my diet, and Drew and I called the host on Saturday to confirm that the meal would be gluten free (because I was more than happy to bring my own food).
It turned out that the food was gluten free, including all of the sauces and marinades, and the host left all of the ingredients out for my inspection once we arrived at his home. The menu included raw oysters for an appetizer and steak salad for the main course. He also served crusty (glutenous) baguettes, which he sliced after we sat down to eat. This wouldn’t have been a problem, except-horror of horrors-immediately after slicing the bread, he opened the container of greens and placed them in the salad bowl without washing his hands! Neither Drew nor I had ever eaten with the host, nor was he one of our close friends, and we didn’t know what to do. My mind was racing: Do I refuse to eat dinner in front of everyone and risk offending host and making the other guests uncomfortable? Do I eat it and risk getting sick? Well, I am embarrassed to report that I ate the salad and have been paying for it since. My stomach is rumbling and, along with the other GI symptoms, I feel light-headed, irritable, and tired. I’m sure that it’s not as bad as if I had eaten a piece of the bread (which I would never do), but I know that it’s damaging my body anyway.
I’m still not sure what I should have done differently in that situation, except that I have decided to no longer accept impromptu dinner invitations without bringing my own food, no matter how adamantly the host insists on making a gluten-free meal. I have been living with my celiac diagnosis for one year now, but sticky situations still arise where I’m not sure what to do. What would you do in that situation?
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Crystal, That is so hard! Especially after your host so graciously tried to accommodate all your needs! I think I might have actually washed my salad after seeing him put it in the bowl with contaminated hands. I might have said something to the effect, “You went to all this trouble and made this fabulous meal and youre going to think I’m CRAZY but I want to enjoy your graciousness and I know the only way I can do that is if I actually wash this amazing food you just served me!” Given my level of sensitivity, I think I would be able to get the greens clean enough that I wouldn’t get sick. But I certainly understand making a policy of just insisting on bringing your own food any time you’re with a new host.
I have DH, and you bet I would have refused the salad!! I actually would have stopped him after cutting the bread and said that he needs to wash his hands before touching any other food.
Just another reason to REALLY educate your friends about your diet! I wonder if a “Friend of a Celiac” printable card would be nice to have?
Hello, Friend of a Celiac!!
Thank you for hosting us today, but let me tell you a little about my health issues and why I go crazy around bread products…..
Hi, Elizabeth–Thanks for your advice!
Hi, Christine–Thanks for your advice! I love your “Friend of Celiac” card idea. You have sparked my creativity–I’ll see what we can come up with!
Hello! I am newly diagnosed with Celiac and just recently have come to understand the idea of cross contamination full on! I accidentally ate some gluten last Friday night and suffered for it for almost 5 days! Abdominal cramps, fatigue and tummy soreness in general has caused me to totally re-evaluate my ideas of this GF diet/life style! I am done licking envelopes, sharing a toaster or even using the same BBQ spatula on the other side of my grill. I have no time for illness such as this and after going GF for only 1 month, I learned a lesson, although by mistake. In the future, I’d be just as paranoid as you were and would not eat that salad! It is too important to not become sick from someone else’s lack of knowledge. Good intentions aside, nobody really understands completely but you or your spouse after much education. A close friend just told me that a good friend will understand and not mind. If they do mind, they are not who you thought they were! Think about it! Protect yourself. That is what matters most!
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